sweetest valentine

happy valentines day, ro!

it's no secret that i LOVE holidays. i love to have a specific decorating theme... i love a reason to celebrate... i love a reason to buy gifts... i love a reason to dress up and spend extra special time with family.

some people think valentines day is silly because you should show your love every day. agree. get it. but... i LOVE the idea of valentines day because though we should show and tell love every single day... this is a specific day on our calendar that we can go all out and make traditions and spend extra special time together... and wear red and pink and eat chocolate together. (you're napping right now with a chocolate face... and i love it... i may just have a bit on my face, too)

so today started out just 'eh... i was pretty disappointed in myself and my overall planning for today.  we have some valentines hanging around, our valentines were delivered to family on time, and you had little stash of valentines to be opened throughout the day... but the house is a wreck, there was no gourmet breakfast, the paper for the planned valentine wreath is still in the hobby lobby bag... and i'm just 'eh.

we watched dad eat a heart shaped breakfast sandwich, you had the left over eggs... we dressed in our festive red and headed to pb kids for story time... and i'm just feeling 'eh.  a look over the house... a wreck, dishes in the sink, bed unmade, empty amazon boxes in a pile in the living room, building blocks and babies everywhere, 1/2 of the unfolded laundry in the laundry room, the other 1/2 on your bed, no grand dinner plans... so chicken and vegetables in the crockpot it is... ugh.

we searched the car for your heart hair clip that would tie your whole valentine outfit together... it was no where to be found and your outfit was just 'eh... i have a love/hate relationship with pb storytime... it's too long for you at this age and you are way too over stimulated in there, especially because they now set up smack in front of the little girl section... so you immediately find the strollers and babies which could never ever compare with a book. but, i want you to learn to sit and listen in a group setting and it's just not something i can teach you at home... so we go and push through.

little did i know that this so-so morning would turn into a perfectly sweet valentine memory for us ;)

i was right, we walked into pbk with your just 'eh valentine outfit and you instantly fell in love with a sweet little baby doll.  it's valentines day.  you love babies.  i love pretty babies.  this was a pretty baby much unlike the baby you are currently in love with.  we were both sold.  we sang a few songs and listened to part of a book... you held the baby and danced with the baby, sat in the chair and showed her the lady reading the book... my heart melted.  we bought the baby. we named her valentine, welcomed her to our family and headed over to starbucks for a little coffee and juice date.

somewhere between the time we entered pbk and the time we picked up our drinks at the coffee shop our day transformed into a most magical little day together.

in the midst of you being the sweetest, most beautiful, free-spirited but completely obedient, lady-like with dirt under your fingernails, ankles crossed clutching your baby, devouring a rice krispie treat, little girl... my phone crahsed and burned. gone. dead. (as dad warned me would soon happen, but i chose to ignore him because my stomach turns at the thought of the price of a new iphone)

i could capture none of it. no picture. no video. i couldn't call your dad or grandma to tell them how precious you were.  ...and it was really kind of nice.  it was just you and me and all the men rushing in and out of the stores buying valentines. there were flower deliveries everywhere. we saw a little girl dressed in a fancy dress, holding a single red rose on a lunch date with her dad.  music was playing.  there was fresh seed for the birds and squirrels and patches of snow along the walkway and in the flower beds.  the sun was golden and warm. the pansies were radiant.  it was just you and me and our baby, valentine.... a juice box, latte and a rice krispie treat... and it was perfect.

you held valentine between your legs and waddled, teaching her to walk.  you reached down and let her touch the snow.  you walked her to the flowers and pointed out the two different colors.  you giggled from the gut at a little squirrel who was doing everything to catch your attention. you were the exact same things with valentine, that i was doing with you one year ago. you were playing mom. and you were loving it.  sometimes i feel like i'm just playing mom, too.  and i'm loving it.

it was one of those moments where i could have cried like a baby.  i am so in love with you. and so very very blessed.  i wiped away a tear and we just sat together. you, me and valentine.

i so wish that your dad and grandparents could have seen you today. you were radiant and beautiful and precious.  but, it's sort of extra sweet and special that it was just us.

then, you pooped.

we went to the car, changed your diaper, stopped by the at&t store and shelled out an insane amount of money for a phone, stopped at the grocery for eggs & peanut butter (and maybe a bag of chocolate kisses) then headed back to our wreck of a home. life. :)

i'm thankful for the birds singing, flowered, sun-shining, not at all planned or expected, sweetest ever valentine day we shared :)

i couldn't ask for more. and it's only just begun.

you're napping.  i'm going to turn into a tornado and whip this house into shape. then, we get to celebrate with dad tonight.

i'm thankful God gave me you. and that He gave me today. He knows just when we need days like this. and He always delivers :)

i love you. happy valentine's sweet girl.
mom